We awoke as the clock struck 10 o' clock. I met up with Ford at Horseshoe Avenue where we walked towards the Black Stallion Raceway. This year was the first year Ford and I finally get to compete in our towns annual race. I was excited to finally show off my perfect form and physique.
"You know Ford, now that we're old enough to race, there's basically no competition anymore! I've been working out at 25 Hour Fitness every single day for three months straight! My accentuated calves are too toned to lose to any of these non-muscular geezers that we're racing against!" This is gonna be too easy, I thought to myself. There's no way these run out, half horse, ponies could stand a chance against me. "I've been waiting for this moment all my life! As a swole pony, I've always dreamt to be just as great as the legendary Dale Earndart, the greatest mustang racer of all time! All I need now is a rider that can handle my swoleness." Just thinking about the race got me so pumped. I flexed my muscles onto Ford just to release my swoleness that was building up from this conversation. As I was flexing, Ford decides to kill my muscular thunder.
"Its not gonna be that easy though Zeus, you know that. And that's another thing, who are you gonna have as a rider? You haven't even thought about that one yet have you?" Saying it with my chest, I confidently responded to his challenge, for I HAD thought about who my rider was going to be.
"Actually, I have thought about that Fordy. There's only one rider that I'd allow to ride these muscles and that's the equally muscular human Vikingpants. Only he and his muscular physique can handle this horsepower. I refuse to let anyone else ride me but there's no way he'll turn me down once he sees my traps and thighs." Ford's attempt to strike down my confidence failed but for some reason, my muscular body was shaking. What is this feeling I am feeling right now? Is this fear? How is the mighty Zeus feeling fear? I have no self-doubt in myself. No. This is not fear. I have no doubt in my mind that Asgard will choose me as a rider. It wouldn't make sense if he doesn't. But for some reason, I kept this feeling for me all the way to the raceway. Was this really fear I was feeling? No. It can't be.
Ford and I entered the raceway. Everyone was already here. Crowds of puny horses and humans surrounded me. As I was scoping out my competition, Ford started to look for his partner.
“Where could he be?” Ford said. “He told me he’d be here.” As he was finishing his sentence, he spotted his rider Harris. “Oh there he is. Well, I'll be seeing you at the race. Good luck with Olav." Ford left to go see Harris. I was still shaking for some reason. Why am I still feeling like this? Am I really doubting my chances with Olav? No, no, no. it must be the adrenaline. I continued through the see of horses and humans looking for Olav. Looking high and low, I spotted my rider-to-be, with his calves obviously flexed and muscular. I approached the viking but for some reason, I could hear my heart beat faster. Stop it! I told myself. Stop! Collect yourself Zeus. You have to present yourself and your body to him. Don’t blow this!
I finally urged myself to talk to him. "Excuse me, Olav, sir." He turned his whole muscular upper body towards me. His beady little eyes acknowledged my presence, which was good. "My name is Zeus. I am pure bred mustang with a 315 squat and a 2.67 40 yard dash and I have become eligible for our towns annual race. I was wondering, Olav sir, knowing you and your muscular physique, if you were looking for a rider. Knowing that no one here is worthy of your time, I was hoping to assume the role of your horse in this year's race for I am in need of a partner." The whole time I was flexing. I hope he noticed. There was a short moment of silence before he spoke.
"My friend, you are wrong. For I have already found myself a partner for this race." The viking nudged his body over to reveal a scrawny horse standing behind him. What! That thing is his HORSE! I can’t believe it! "This is Harris, my horse." Olav put his giant hand on my shoulder but at this point, no words or gestures would comfort me. "I am sorry my friend but I am in no need of another horse. Sorry."
"Oh I am sorry to hear that. Well I'll be on my way then. Good luck on the race and stay swole." Trembling in confusion, I walked away in disappointment. How? How did a scrawny, misfigured horse like that get selected by Olav Jensen? How? What does he have that I don’t? I was the only one worthy of Olav. That skinny little horse probably can’t even squat 95lbs let alone serve as Olav’s horse! As my thoughts were going crazy, I felt something bump into me. I looked around found a stranger on the floor.
“Oh sorr- oh you’re a big one aren’t you?!” Dusting himself off, the stranger gazed at me. I responded to the average looking guy.
“Excuse me, sir, I didn’t see you there,” I said.
“Oh no worries. Just a little dirt on myself thats all.” The man continued to look at me, top to bottom. “Well from the looks of it, I’d say you’re participating in today’s race am I wrong? What’s a fine looking horse like you doing all alone? Where’s your rider?” These questions the man were asking hurt just to hear but I can't leave the man without an answer.
“Well, sir, I unfortunately don’t have a rider. I was intended to have Olav Jensen as my rider but it seems he had already found a horse.” I sighed with anguish. Having to think about the situation only hurts me even more. As I was contemplating about leaving the conversation at that, the man started to talk again.
“Oh well it seems we are both out of luck. You see my horse who I have competed with all my life has fallen ill. She has the flu and so I couldn’t force it you know?” The man looked like he was in an equal amount of disappointment. Wow. This man looks really hurt. He must have had a good horse with great calves. “My name is Clyde by the way.”
“My name is Zeus.” I don't know what's making me continue the conversation but I didn't let it stop me. Something about this strange fellow made me want to stay with him. Despite his average physique, something strange kept me interested. Should I? No. Well. Maybe. I guess in this situation, I have no choice. “Well, I have just become eligible and I’ve always dreamed about racing in this competition. There’s no way I’d sit out. So, Clyde, with that being said, would you be my rider?”
“I’d be honored to have you as a horse.” Clyde mounted onto me and we rode off towards the starting line. As we did so, the sun was in my eyes.