“Who I’m I…?”, I am still learning about myself everyday but freestyle has given me the opportunity to branch out to new things. In film we made a video about ourselves. We each created a narrative and I chose to reflect on a challenge that I have. My two minute video was on my undiagnosed ADHD and my struggles of teachers telling me I need to be tested and cant focus. I guess they are right but I never really wanted to label myself. In digital media we worked on our mandalas and I found this activity calming and fun to do. Through this is my first year at freestyle, I ran into some walls making the mandala but in the end I loved what I made even more because of the struggle. In English we talked about who we are and were able to write about it. Even though I am only 18 and have a lot more of my life to live, I had fun reflecting on what I have lived.
While working on these projects I learned that I have gotten better at asking for help when I need it. I struggle to admit that I need help, I always have but this year I have gotten better at reaching out even if it is just a question of confirmation or confusion. I have found that I am able to focus more because I love what I am doing in freestyle. I have been loving English because I get to write about what I want, not with restrictions to a certain topic or to spit out information that we read in a book. I get to write about not only something that I want to write about but something I am passionate about. I have loved digital media because I get to try out new and cool things. I have learned so much with all of this software. In film we have been studying different movies and scenes which I have loved. I love being able to see things happen in a scene or film that I other wise would not have noticed. I also have learned so much in this class about cameras, shots and different placements of characters in the screen. I have really enjoyed freestyle and everything I have and will learn.
In English we were asked to list out items, “Essence objects” that we felt were important to us and had character value to us. The following list are items that contribute to who I am…
- Picture of my family and I
- My paints and brushes
- Polaroid camera
- My phone with pictures on it
- Earbuds so I can listen to music
- Microphone so that I can sing in choir
- Choir music binder
- My journal
- Picture of my friend that past away
- Drawing journal
- Cuesta Park
- My tennis racket
- The Office and Gilmore Girls
- My bed because it is my safe place
- Sunflowers because they are my favorite flower
- A picture of my cat that had passed away when I was little
I valued the tiny parts of creating my personal mandala. While my mandala is black and white there are so many different shapes and lines weaved together to make it exciting. There is a lot of small fragments in my mandala which helped me to understand that even the small things matter even when this piece grew to be huge. Each line has its purpose and contributes to the mandala as a whole. I loved seeing how the program made what I did to one side appear on the other. This reminded me of how there are consciences to everything, every action taken, there is a positive or negative effect. Even the smallest line still showed up on the other pieces of the mandala. This also applies to growth. While digital media can be hard for me at times, because everything is so new, starting small and building knowledge piece by piece can give me a better understanding. All of the small and big parts of my mandala came together and I am happy with the piece of art that came from it.
Film Reflections Video
In my two minute video, I emulated what its like trying to focus in my mind. This video highlights my undiagnosed ADHD and my struggles of teachers telling me I need to be tested and can’t focus. I never really wanted to label myself even though everyone around me tells me that I cant seem to stay focus and need help. I don’t like asking for help it is a struggle of mine. I have always been someone who wants to do it by themselves and doesn’t want help. This is something that I have been and need to work on because I know that I cant do everything by myself and do need help sometimes.
Time doesn’t stop, it’s always moving and going by. If I had a dime for every time I wished I could stop or slow down time, I’d be rich. When I was little all I ever wanted to do was grow up and skip to the future. Oh how I wish now to go back or at least to tell my younger self to enjoy it more, that time doesn’t stop and moments pass. I grew from this because I have not used Photoshop before and I learned a new skill. I not only have a new skill but I learned to not take time for granted and to enjoy the moments I am living. As I am new to this software I needed to learn how to use everything. I struggled to create an eraser brush. Something that seemed like a simple task took me a while. I battled with layers when I erased the wrong part of a layer. In the end it came together and I am proud of myself for trying something new. I don’t think I want to change it, this picture demonstrates an issue that I feel I face. Taking time, people and memories for granted. The young girl reaching and trying to hold back the clock hand shows how I feel in trying to slow life down and somehow go back. I am most proud that I was able to figure out how to do it! I am not the best with technology so working with new software is difficult. I am proud of myself for not giving up and doing my best to get it done and being happy with the end product. In the future when I use this app I can use the knowledge that I’ve gained from this project to help me with future projects. This can further my understanding with this app so that these future projects will be easier and there will be less struggles that I come across. As I looked at others Surreal pieces of art I was stunned by how others put images together and thought of those visuals. It showed me a glimpse of these artists’ minds. A picture tells a thousand words but these images also showed us their thoughts and perceptions. This project helped me see that people are so creative and our creativity is endless.