Last year one of our first photo blog prompts was a “self-portrait” picture. I spent (literally) an hour trying to set up the shot and take the perfect photo. I spent almost the same amount of time coming up with the “perfect” caption. I was trying so hard, it was no longer fun. I still try my best, but I’ve learned in the past two years of Freestyle to loosen up and have fun. To enjoy what I’m working on. To allow everything to become something I’m passionate about, not something I’m stressed about. Although it is, of course, easier said than done, I am proud of how far I’ve come in that respect.
At the beginning of my Junior year I took a photo of butter and sugar on a black table. It was very aesthetic, well framed, and met all the requirements. Just a couple of weeks ago, I baked a cake with a friend. It turned out not-so-beautifully, but it was fun! Every time something went wrong (which happened very frequently), we just laughed and said it gave it more character. I was able to let go of stress and expectations, and I really enjoyed making such an ugly cake. I even went out on a limb and we started randomly decorating it with food coloring, something I would have never allowed myself to do 2 years ago.
At the beginning of Junior year I was the raw butter and sugar, and now I feel like the cake (no matter how imperfect, it’s been baked into something better!)
I’m grateful for the past-versions of myself, and I do still hold on to parts of them. But I’m also grateful for the growth I’ve experienced in being able to let go and enjoy myself.
Cheers to me- past, present, and future!
